i struggle to express myself all the time. it's hard enough in english; trying to do it in mandarin is super-tough. cantonese is almost as bad. gone are the simple days of spanish class when, if you didn't know what to say, you could just "lie," using a grammatically well-formed sentence. now people ask me questions, from why-can't-you-make-dinner-tonight, to do-you-think-you've-matured-in-the-last-semester, and i'm supposed to say what i actually mean.